"I tried talking things out with her calmly,yet with just few words from me,she flares up,i am confused,why are we always arguing"
Are you in a relationship,or already married?Do you find it a arguing very challenging? Well it is very common to see two people in a relationship not agreeing in little or every matter.But as it is often said,there are solutions to every problem. Realize that arguments can ruin a relationship, can vanquish love,on this note,it is time to change things to preserve the love you both feel for each other.
There are three factor that strikes up argument.The first one is differences.This is true because humans are created with different likes and dislikes.One man's meat is another man's poison.Different views on a particular matter can cause you both to fall into serious argument. The second factor is lack of understanding. Many find it hard understanding their loved one,like the example i cited at the beginning of this post.The third reason is lack of deep concern. Sometimes saying things,not even caring how your partner feels.
Therefore, how can you overcome this challenge or arguing? There are some questions you need to ask yourself. These questions are as follows:
1.What makes us argue?
2.Do i need to work on my emotions?
3.Do i show it in my words and actions that i really value his or her opinion, likes,and wants?
Here is an advice,learn to talk things calmly,perhaps late at night, sharing together your likes and dislikes,try to agree on a solution,at this point,try to control your temper.Futhermore,do not always want your own desire or want stands,don't be selfish,consider that of your lover also.When an issue arise,don't just flare up,ask questions like "why do you want this", then explain calmly how you also feel about it,talk about the outcome,weigh the circumstances involved,then you can be able to agree.
It's not always easy,but it's worth the effort to try it out,instead of tearing down your relationship, you will rather build each other up in love.
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